i just realized i haven't gushed about any sexy guys for a while. whats happening to me?? is rifle all i want? haha jk. i love you gackt!

i've taken off my bandage. wow this healed pretty fast... the wound is almost fully closed, and the gap of skin at the surface is slowly getting smaller and it is fun to look at it. man if i keep getting hurt and leaving all these scars, i'm going to be pretty ugly and with all this crap on me later. gross. i don't understand how people can read several books at once. don't you get confused? i do.. i'm still not done with war and peace.. its been on hold for like 2 years, hah. still on page whatever. i wrote it down somewhere. and i remember some of the characters, that princess, and, oh forget it. ohkay, so i think i get the rifle situation now. i can be on the rifle line next year, for field season. ah, i get it. no wonder mark told me to practice my backhands, because if i didn't i would be too behind. i like rifle and all, but i will miss being a flag. ooo we cleaned the new work today, and i'm so proud! *sniff* it works much better when there is less people, and the best is 2 people being cleaned and 2 people cleaning because then you can watch and do it with them. um i splintered my rifle. jk. well, i was tossing and i noticed something sharp scratching me, and upon closer inspection i realized that part of it was like detaching... so i put more tape on it... half of its weight is probably tape now.. i'm beginnning to notice how strangly obsessive i am about rifle...in fact, i like to call it rifle, as if it was its name, not like "my rifle" (noun) but like "rifle" (name). and look how much i'm writing about it! i am nuts! ok i shall try to keep my obsession from taking over everything... its kinda boring to practice rifle without anyone else because.. theres only so much i can do.. and no one is there to correct my mistakes! thats the part of cleaning i like.. so i know my mistakes so i can try to correct them. i hate it when i do something wrong and much later someone tells me. arg you could have told me before. especially when they go "oh, you ALWAYS do this part wrong, its like this." why didn't you show me before! i've looked like a fool. haha jk, it sounds so.. over-dramatic. yuck to much colorguard stuff. oooo competition is coming up! (sorry i can't stop) friday and saturday! 21st and 22nd! whoot i wish we could have a sleepover in the bandroom though. mmm i slept in armstrongs class today and this time i smartly put my arm on my head and held my pencil so at least it looked like i was taking notes. it was scary because someone once told me that he was walking around, and then he stopped by my desk and paused because he noticed me sleeping. oops. i hate stupid spanish. damn zulouga. oops everytime i spell his name it gets more and more wrong. oh well. we watched les mis in english today. and i was SO MAD because damn claire danes that bitch was cosette. arg she angers me so. arg and she acts as if she knows shes pretty or something. arg. ARG!!! and that marius! hes so ugly! and so not a man. when he was shot, he was all whimpering and stuff. loooooooser! be a man! suck it up! the book version was better, when he was unconscious or fainted or whatever. man that stupid movie ruined marius forever. damn. ooo they make me so mad! and they're so stupid! they are like leading javert right to poor valjean. its so sad because cosette is so mean to him! i hate how the movie is wrong. she wasn't supposed to know he was a convict! today i was feeling extremely dizzy. in 3rd period it went to the point that i thought i was going to throw up. i tried to put my head down but then that made the spinning more acute and painful. so i had to sit up. arg. today it was weird in colorguard. i dunno if i should say this. but i think people noticed anyways. oh god i just ranted like 2 pages.. but i had to delete it... because it got a little, er, violent and offensive. oh well. i saved it somewhere though. i didn't type all that shit just to delete it....

oh yeah, before i forget,
THANK YOU MICHELLE FOR THE CLEAR CD CASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

oh, the drama that unfolds! (sorry no details available. tis a secret. or, i wish to keep it to myself)

guess what. afterschool i went to rogan to ask about the essay, and me and michelle were pointing out where we sat, and then where we sat last time, and WE SAT IN THE EXACT SAME SEAT! crazy, eh?

yay i'm happy because i have solved my julius caesar essay dilemma. i found out how caesar could be the tragic hero afterall. :) aw i hope i can be convincing or else i will totally fail the essay. because for brutus, its so obvious that he could be the hero, i mean there is a lot of supporting evidence. but i just don't like him. also, it wasn't right to me.. so i hope i can be strong about caesar because i have less hard-core evidence, and if i'm not strong i'll fail. darn. but also we have practice today! i like practice. mmm i want to do this. but i have no money! :(

o much happened today. first we changed seats in english. we also changed seats in chem (which was good) and math (which was not that good but still much better) before. but in english, man! i got a terrible seat. not fair! i liked my seat! oh the horror! whats-his-name sits in front of me. yuck. also, i have no one to talk to. rogan dissolved the corner! noooooooooo! ah it was so much better before.. why? why?!?! i have the anguish, it is in me. also, we found out today that since we were "so good" and all this other complimentary things, effective immediately, we are no longer in our current (or no longer current.. o_0;) circuit, or whatever the name of that thing we're in. we got bumped up to this group with all these good people! ok yay, we're good, but now we're going to suck!! not fair!!! *cries* hah this is funny, because when we prayed susan wouldn't perform, thu said "now we'll now what our real talent is" or something like that. and we got 2nd. and now we get bumped up. aw susan sucks. HA. she better not join next year or i will pull out my hair and refuse to join and try to get others to do the same. i'm sorry, i just hate her. aaaaaarg she makes me so freaking mad... ARG. i was sleeping today in math and christina turned around and blew in my face. i woke up for a second, then fell back to sleep and dreamed about draco malfoy. near the end, i was running and i actually kicked out at the christina's desk and it jolted me awake. haha how embarrasing. 0^__^0 heh. i woke up thinking "oops." watched more les mis in english. well at least i have a good view from my crappy seat. it was funny because we watched the court scene, and that was the scene we performed in class. hi-larious, especially when the prosecutor goes "are you or are you not the convict jean valjean?" or something. haha i can picture yvone saying it. oh well. we got 30 out of 30 on that project too. and janet was mad because we kept talking during class whilst we were supposed to be working. i went to track today. it was pointless and boring. PLUS angela didn't show up. that little.. i want to strangle her. me and grace were.. kind of lost in the beginning. when we were warming up, and doing that A-skip B-skip stuff, i almost forgot it all. then it all came flooding back. except i was doing them whilst unconsciously pointing my toes. >_@;; freaky. i have become a colorguard person. o we saw a fellow colorguard-er there. well, ex-colorguard-er. um i know her name.. i just forgot... ¬ x;;; its just so weird to flex my feet! when i was stretching i looked down and noticed my feet all turned out and pointed. yarg, its ingrained into my brain... i think miiiiiichelle forgot about giving me the cd case. i want it. i tried a shoulder roll today. heh. i'm hopeless. >_<'' uh oh i still haven't started reading ap euro.. ooo theres a poetry contest and a short story contest.. i think i will enter.. except first i have to get a library card. heh. still don't have mine.. mm i want to drive already. i forgot to change my monthly calenderS (hmm more than one calender? am i nuts? no the people who gave them to me are. jk.) so i changed them today. i changed the LOTR one and it was aragorn. haha i bet ms rogan would like that. then i changed the harry potter one and it was "griffindor vs slitheryn" or something w/ harry and draco staring down each other. haha funny. i wish i could show jennifer. or make her a copy. HAR. i think i'm being a little too sloppy with homework. or i have some sort of concentration problem. either way, i just cannot bring myself to do it... for instance, i waste my time doing things like a) rifle-ing, b) sleeping, c) watching tv, d) eating slowly, e) wandering around, f) doing chores (that sucks), g) oh and THIS, writing in this useless blog.

last year martinez asked me if i wanted to be a "serious athlete" and if i was joining track again next year. i said yes. but i don't want to work.. i'm so lazy. also mark asked me if i was coming back to colorguard next year, and i said yes. but i kind of feel like quitting. yes, i'm that kind of person. a lazy quitter...

i'm not sure if i still want to join track. stupid colorguard. *shakes fish* ah well... i don't know if its colorguard.. but if i weren't in colorguard i would be so bored i would join track. but now.. plus i still remember all those stupid long hot days getting all sweaty and dusty and sometimes bloody. and that one time we had to stay so late we watched the sun set ¬ ¬;; ahh track is badly organized. i brought my rifle home today. i thought there was a reason why i shouldn't bring it home and only when i got home did it occur to me that alicia might need it during class. oh well. plenty of other rifles around... i can do backhands better now... and i tried some on the left.. i can do 1 real one now. a part of me hates colorguard but i can't get away from it.

today we roasted 5-year old peanuts in chem. it smelled sickening. X( bleh. i wish i was someone else online so then i could talk to my sn and see my buddy icon. i mean, i can't even admire it because its not like i talk to myself. i feel bad. a 3.5 i think, for my gpa. 3 A's, 3 B's... and the ap euro A isn't even.. real. man thats the lowest i ever got... i don't want to do homework.. i think i have senior-itis. hmmmm what am i taking next year? ap us history, spanish IV, math analysis/calc, ap english, colorguard? i don't even know if i'm going to take ap chem or ap bio. or if i'm taking math anal during the summer so i can take calc AB next year and be rid of harris, HA. maaaan colleges are already mailing me stuff. i don't want to get that junk mail because i don't want to think of college. i hate moving on and growing up and stuff like that.. because i always like things the way they are... it would be nice if everyone from cerritos went to the same college.. ok not everyone. but i would miss plenty of people. why am i talking like this? i'm only a sophmore... its probably the senioritis. i thought i had that last year, too. hmmmmm colorguard. hmmmmm ap bio/chem. hmmmm calc AB... you know most surgeons major in biology in college... i think i read that somewhere.. i know i said i gave up on that but... did i really? because if i really do give up on being a surgeon i have nothing else to do. that was my only interest, i think. mmm i want to take a shower and have pleasant dreamless sleep. and listen to music. but i gotta do homework. mmmmm i found the song i was looking for. fushigi yuugi, star. hm it says "various artists".... i want to watch more les mis in english except i dread seeing claire danes. yuck i can't believe i just typed out her name. *shudder* i expect i shall have a violent reaction when she first comes out... yarg, she just gets on my nerves... >(

wow i just checked my math grade. so i DON'T have a c. whew!! ;;_;; here you can see part of it...

Grade: B (85%)
Total Points: 1368.00/1607
Class Rank: 14

HOMEWORK (240) 1ST QTR HOMEWORK (120) 120 100% A+ 11/8/02
2ND QTR HOMEWORK (120) 120 100% A+ 1/27/03
Category Average 240.00/240 100% A+

NOTEBOOK (100) 1ST QTR NOTEBOOK (50) 50 100% A+ 11/8/02
2ND QTR NOTEBOOK (50) 50 100% A+ 1/27/03
Category Average 100.00/100 100% A+

CLASS PARTICIPATION (100) 90 90% A- 1/31/03

1ST SEMESTER PROJECT (150) 145 97% A 1/30/03

1ST SEMESTER FINAL EXAM (300) 255 85% B 1/31/03


cool eh? haha i barely worked on the project... ok, i didn't work at all, and i still got an a on it! thats the first time i didn't practically do the whole thing or at least do my part.. oh well. man my gpa is still bad though. :( i am sad... lets see, heres a review of my semester grades... ap euro-A, spanish-B (85.9%, damn), chemistry-B (88%, damn), algebra II/trig-B (85%, yay), english-A (95%, yay), and colorguard-A. i'm not sure about percent or whatever, but i'm pretty sure its an a, as it is like pe. haha pe. pe classes and pe-like classes are always a guareentee a. hahha. man i got hw today. :( i should go do it, i guess. o i forgot to say this yesterday, i mean saturday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY JEAN! haha oh, and HAPPY GROUNDHOG'S DAY! thats supposed to be february 2nd.... oh well better late than never.

oooo i was playing with my rifle on friday before practice and it gave me a big gash on my finger. man it was deep. it scared me. one of the staples was sticking out and as i was tossing, it sliced my finger. ow. it was nasty because it was all open... uck. then i closed it but the blood rushed out. *shudder* ok so friday, we went to the mall to watch the recruit... it was ok, but man i wanted to watch chicago, but they didn't play it in cerritos. >F i still want to watch it, and i was about to go today, but oh well.
saturday: COMPETITION MAN!!!!!! i was sooo nervous... and man i blanked out on some parts and whoa it was scary. but we got 2nd place!!!!!!!!!!!! :D :D :D :D :D yay i am so happy. oooo there was this one girl from this one school (i forgot michelle!) and she looked almost exactly like denise!!! it was sooooo funny! and i was watching her and it was so funny because it was like watching denise perform. she dropped her sabre. oh well. man at first the guards we were watching were very... not good... 0_0 they made me feel really nervous though... it was so freakin hot in the gym and i kept getting dizzy every time i bent down to pick up something or to move my bag.. very upsetting. oops its late and i gotta do my ap euro essay. will write again later... tomorrow...erggggggggg stupid essay..

ok lemme tell you what happened in the past few days... lets see..
thurday: we had practice, except mark wasn't there.
friday: we had practice, and mark was there. i was so sore from that, i don't know why... we did run-throughs over and over. and i was starting to get nervous... oh yeah, we got a new table for the kitchen. its bigger and rectangle shaped.
oops going to watch serving sara.. i'll continue later